OMGPD: Mushrooms, Mayhem and a Man In a Tree

Police Find Suspect – Up a Tree

Sometimes firefighters rescue kittens from trees. And sometimes, they rescue fully-grown men suspected of assault out of trees, which .

Police arrived at the 25-year-old man’s home after the man allegedly assaulted a 61-year-old man by dragging him down a flight of stairs and knocking him unconscious, eventually sending him to the hospital with broken ribs. After drafting up a warrant, officers went to go look for the man at his home — only to find the man “standing in a tree approximately six feet off the ground,” according to reports.

The man allegedly refused to climb down until a rescue vehicle arrived. He was arraigned at Our Lady of Fatima Hospital and bail was set at $10,000. Police also issued a no-contact order between the men.

Does a Restraining Order Apply to Saliva?

One Woonsocket woman needs to get a refresher on the definition of restraining order … and its restrictions regarding saliva. According to police, a 40-year-old woman was talking on her cell phone while sitting in her parked car outside Price Rite when . When she looked to find the culprit with overactive salivary glands, she discovered that the spitting suspect was none other than a 26-year-old woman whom she had a restraining order against, according to police. The woman left the scene, but was later picked up by police only 30 minutes later.

From Robbery Victim to Arrestee, One Mushroom at a Time

One Woonsocket man probably hopes that his arrest this past weekend was a hallucinogenic trip induced by mushrooms — According to police, the 31-year-old man was playing video games with a friend, his 10-year-old daughter and four other guests when one of the men (identified as “D”) offered everyone marijuana. (The daughter was the only one who did not accept, said police.) Shortly after, the four guests allegedly forced the man and his daughter to sit on the couch, demanding their cash, keys and cell phones. The men allegedly stole two laptops and two game consoles. As police searched the apartment, they allegedly found a bag of hallucinogenic mushrooms (weighing 11.5 grams) in the man’s bedroom, which he allegedly admitted was his.

Teens Break Into School

Most students dream of ways to break out of school, but apparently a . Four teens (two males aged 17 and 19 and two females aged 14 and 16) were found in a Barrington Elementary School last week after tripping the building’s alarm, according to reports. The teens weren’t trying to relive their elementary school days: They reportedly told officers they entered the building to use the bathroom. Police found no damage to the building and issued trespassing warnings to the teens.

Prudence Island Man Tries to Run Over Neighbor With Truck

Don’t expect these Prudence Island neighbors to host a block party together. According to Portsmouth police, a .

Though the neighbor had authorization from the volunteer fire department to burn the brush, the man allegedly continued to become upset and told his neighbor he would “kill” him. Apparently, the threat was not enough to satiate the man’s fury and he allegedly jumped into his pickup truck and drove toward his neighbor, forcing him to jump out of the way. Police arrested the man, who is being charged with felony assault.

Vomiting Man Gets Hit With DUI

Swerving? Check. Speeding? Check. Slurred speech? Check. Vomit? Double check. A Newport man fulfilled many requirements for a in Middletown after officers allegedly saw him swerve and nearly hit a center island in the road, then speed down another road in the wrong lane. 

During the stop, officers reportedly noticed the man had vomited on himself and his zipper was completely down. (The man reportedly attributed the vomit to a shot he had before he left the bar that “did not go down right.”) After allegedly testing his blood alcohol content at a reported .146 and .145 in subsequent tests, police took him into custody.